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Bro(ke) Dieting

I see dudes all the time saying they can't eat healthy or dont have the cash. Both are a fucking lie. I have devised a very farty semi healthy diet for dudes who are strapped for cash. I'm no dietician, and I'm sure someone somewhere will be like "bro if you eat rice or beans or meat you'll fucking die of dick cancer" well a legion of pro bodybuilders made gains off the instant suicide diet of boiled chicken and brown rice, you can at least try if you're poor and too retarded to cook decent human meals every night. What am I saying, some of you sickos probably like eating dry chicken and rice... Truly a powerful caste of humans.

All that dry chicken and al dente rice won't bring her back Frank.

How am I doing DBC?


• MAIN Mother fucking chickens. WHOLE chickens are cheap as shit. It costs about 8 USD tops here for one. Buy whole chickens and learn to butcher them yourself and save hundreds of bucks a year. Here is some protein math on an average sized chicken: - Chicken breast: 54 grams in one boob, or 31 grams per 100 grams - Chicken thigh: 14 grams in one thigh, or 26 grams per 100 grams - Chicken drumstick: 12 grams in one drumstick, or 28 grams per 100 grams - Chicken wings: 6 grams in one wing, or 30 grams per 100 grams Add that shit up and multiply by two and you'll get about 170g of protein and some good healthy fats from the dark meats. At the end of the meal, take the spines and the bones you didnt slobber all over (this shouldn't be very many) and freeze them till the end of the week. When you have 7 dead chickens in the freezer, pull out their bodies and a huge ass stock pot (or a instant pot or crock pot) and boil their bones for 24 hours with a splash of vinegar, some salt, and whatever vegetables odds and ends you have left from the week (more on that later). Now use this bone broth when you make rice for extra fat and some healing collagen for your gut. Along side the whole chicken, eat eggs. Eggs are basically Test E for poors (me) and people afraid to pin. One egg has about 7g of protein but the thing you want here is the cholesterol, which is the precursor to testosterone. Eggs here are fairly cheap, I buy them in 5 dozen cartons for under 10 USD. Vince Gironda actually ate 36 eggs daily and compared it to a mild Dbol cycle or something like that.

• SIDES

Rice. That's shits easy. A 50lb bag is cheap (20 USD) and it makes a shit ton of rice. A cup has about 4g of protein but that doesn't matter because it's one of your carb sources. Cooked in bone broth you may double that intake. Another addition you can make to the list is dried beans. Great northern beans (the superior bean) are like 30 USD for 25lbs. One cup has about 12g of protein and a little more carbs. It's good for variety and I love beans even though they are inflammatory.

• VEGGIES

Look man you gotta eat em. Buy one or two in season veggies each week and eat them with your food. This is for longevity and general health. Keep the weird edible parts you normally dont eat (carrot ends, onion bits, potato skin, etc) and toss those fuckers into the bone broth boil. Always own garlic though.

• EXTRAS

Now obviously this is very bare bones and it would suck to eat like this if you like variety or whatever hippy shit goobers like to say these days, but it works. For around 300 USD you can eat 3 pretty healthy meals a day for a month with around 200g protein, 150g carbs, and under 100g of fat (1 whole roasted chicken, 2 cups of rice, 1 cup of beans, 3-4 eggs, bone broth, and miscellaneous nonstarchy vegetables). This is a loose approximation but hey whatever it takes goddamn it. I would also drink a glass of milk every day just because dairy is badass and I love it before bed. Some good additions when you have the cash are: ground beef, chuck roast (sliced thin and tenderized to make what I call Hobo steaks), cheddar cheese, kefir, peanut butter (good for mass gaining, 2 spoonfuls after each meal), and the occasional fruit. Also LEARN TP FUCKING COOK IT ISNT HARD.


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